my shame is large

These are the things I am thinking about at 5:30 AM.

1. After last night, my brain has decided that congress would make an excellent sitcom. No, okay, stay with me here. Just imagine all the tomfoolery and DUIs and petty grudges with a laugh track. The titles would be set to a politicized version of Where Everybody Knows Your Name, possibly called Where Everybody Knows You Fuck Young Pages. Senator Mike Crapo would affectionately be the butt of every joke. Imagine the glory.
   
   
2. Why was there flowing lava behind Bobby Jindal during his response speech? I suspect that alone would make an incredible episode: S01E08 THE ONE WITH THE LAVA, in which Jindal is somehow stranded on a Hawaiian Island and only the extremely rugged Anderson Cooper stands between him and an untimely molten death. B-plot: Nancy Pelosi discovers Jolt Energy drinks.
   
   
3. I've had far too much tea this evening and been left to my own devices for far too long because I'm looking up tea leaf meanings on google. How does one differentiate a coin from a circle from a ball when you're reading tea leaves? And how exactly would they manage to convey that they are a glow? Not aglow - I'd be slightly concerned if my tea was literally exuding light - but glow as a noun. This confuses me. And the only thing I can find in my tea leaves is a clump of leaves that looks remarkably like an amoeba.
   
   
4. What would Castiel look like with a pornstache? Furthermore, what would Castiel look like with a pornstache while wearing a members only jacket?

Good morning. :D