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kiiimmm of joy!
Kitty says:
Happy Birthday, Kim!
In order to properly celebrate the anniversary of Kim's spectacular birth, I have compiled a meager offering of pretty people being pretty with each other. Some are pretty women, some are pretty men, and I think there is also a storm trooper in there somewhere. Needless to say, this is probably not worksafe!
You thought I was kidding about the storm trooper, didn't you.
Also, Kim's already seen this because I spammed her with it in IM, but it's a short, cracky HP/SPN crossover and I felt the need to share. AKA I have two hundred more pages to read before morning and I don't want to.
Supernatural/Harry Potter crossover crack
Slight spoiler warning for Deathly Hallows!
Dean stared down at the limp corpse under his foot, moonlight gleaming red off the tip of his blade.
"Huh," he said.
"HUH?" a nearby teenager shrieked incredulously, hurling past Sam's octopus-like, grasping arms and landing a wimpy punch somewhere south of Dean's left nipple. "HUH? Is that all you have to say for yourself? This was supposed to be my bloody day! It was my destiny, you berk! Did you not see the fantastic glowy stone in my hand and the silvery hovering ghosts?"
Dean blinked. "No, not really. He had red eyes, dude. I just sort of went, 'oh, that's not good.'"
"'Oh, that's not' - are you serious?" the teenager said faintly. Even his shock of black, messy hair seemed to deflate. "I...think I need to sit down." With that, the kid's legs went out from under him, and he wound up sprawled on his back staring blankly up at the canopy of trees above them.
"Can we go back to America?" Dean asked Sam. "The banshees and bogarts and stuff were cool, but this place is kind of weird."
Sam insisted on helping the poor kid back to his school, even though Dean thought he might be part of some freaky British cult: the scar on his head was way too perfect to be an accident, and lightning bolts? Bad news. He changed his tune, though, when the school came into view.
"What the fuck," he said. Sam echoed him a moment later. Because, seriously, what the fuck. There were bodies littering the freaking ground like so much confetti.
A small gaggle of living people looked up when they staggered past the tree line, and one of the younger girls screeched, "HARRY!"
"Um, why is she waving a stick at us?" Dean asked.
"I think it might be her wand, Dean," Sam said, wide-eyed.
"Her wand," Dean repeated blankly. "Right."
"That's Hermione," the teenager in their arms interjected helpfully. "She's bossy. And short."
Sam snickered quietly behind a hand and merely shrugged when Dean tried to glare him into submission - you gotta admit it's funny. Thankfully, they'd created a body language-language when they were young out of pure necessity, so Dean was able to communicate, you are the worst brother ever and I hate you, now let's give the teenie over and get out of here, with only a few twitches of his eyebrows and a subtle shift of his right foot.
"Oh, Harry!" Hermione said when she reached them, descending on the teenager in a cloud of hair. "We were so worried, Harry! Don't ever do that to us again, Harry, honestly! Who are these people, Harry?"
She pulled away from a now very dazed looking Harry and gave them both considering looks, as though they were bringing Harry to senior prom instead of back from the battle of his life. Her eyes lingered on Dean's shoulders for a little too long.
"Well, hello," she purred.
"Meep," Dean said.
Hermione sidled a little closer, looking love struck and also completely underage. "Wow, you're really tall," she said. "And strong."
"Also? Also, I'm very, very gay. So ga - " he yelped, jumping away from her pinching fingers, "SO GAY that my lover here, " Sam looked mildly amused when Dean tried to hide behind him, "came with me from America so we wouldn't be parted."
"But you called him mrrphh glrgh rrrruuurrr," Harry said around Dean's hand.
"Very, very gay," Dean intoned grimly.
Hermione sighed and looked between him and Sam, who was manfully holding in his laughter. "Can I at least watch?"
"DON'T WORRY, HARRY, I'LL SAVE YOU!" a ginger blur hollered, diving past Hermione and tackling Harry to the ground.
"Ron! Oh, bugger," Hermione said.
Dean blinked twice at Sam, and Sam twitched his jaw back while his right index finger curled in, and they quickly beat a hasty retreat, heading for the cover of the forest in complete silence.
("DID I SAVE YOU, HARRY?"
"Really, Ron, I'm fine, mfhhrr gllrrrk.")
"Let's not come back to England, okay?" Dean said firmly, wiping his blade off on a bed of moss.
"Yeah," Sam agreed readily. A moment's pause while they both pondered the oddities of England. And then, "Very, very gay, Dean?"
"Fuck off," Dean growled.
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YAY FOR PRETTY.
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WOw, i havent talked to her or you in FOREVERS :D
Let her know i love her and stuff :D
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("DID I SAVE YOU, HARRY?"
"Really, Ron, I'm fine, mfhhrr gllrrrk.")
MWAHAHAHA. Really. This entire thing = SO MUCH WIN.
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I must say that you write the most fabulicious crack. *apparently still remembers the snail!fic...* X3
Gotta rec this ficlet on my LJ. *g*
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BECAUSE IT DOES.
Also, re: That Girl from BSG: She is totally hot. woooooooooow.
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