this might be the place

WOW, look at all that wank. All three of my fandoms are arguing! It's almost like an orgy of ill-feeling! Amazing. Is it that everyone's on their period (because, screw airborne pheromones, flists cycle together) or is Helluary just rearing its butt-ugly head early this year?

If so, this is me boycotting in advance.



Aaaand, this is the part you skip over if you're not interested in my university shenanigans. ( That's right, I have class on Sunday at nine in the morning. Am I on crack? Possibly. ) God, if only it didn't take an hour and a half to get to school every day. Makes me actually wish I'd learned how to drive. Ungh. *drags self off to shower*

My thread at the stalker meme. Go stalk me! I am really oblivious to my surroundings! I will never see you coming if you wear a bush!

In other news, I somehow managed to miss one of my midterms. No idea HOW, but, yeah, really not good. Hopefully the professor will give me a chance to retake it, otherwise I am totally and completely fucked up the ass. God, I hate school. I just want to skip to graduation and then spend my life working at a library or my own bookstore, going to protest rallies, and writing erotic short stories. I'm not asking for much, world.

Oh, speaking of erotic short stories. A while back, immoralilly and I were talking about putting together a book of original one-shots by fandom writers. The published erotica market, on the whole, is truly and appallingly bad, you know? Fan authors could do so much better. And, okay, probably not that much of an original idea, but leave me my illusions.

[Poll #1080090]
I think most stories would have to be between 1,500 and 5,000 words, and, while they wouldn't have to be incredibly graphic, there should definitely be actual description of the sex and not just a tasteful fade to black. What would be the point, right? If there's enough of a response, I'll recruit a few of you to help get a more concrete idea of how this thing'll work, and then make another post with a more solid idea of what's going to happen.

This post is just really to gage interest, but I would love it if you could all pimp it out! ♥

Oh, mid-semester. You bring with you such unending agony and torment.

For instance: have you ever sat down at your computer with Word open and stared at the blinking cursor for fifteen straight minutes?

"My, I should probably start, shouldn't I?" you say. Another ten minutes go by. "Really, I'm about to start." You get in about fifty words. "Impressive! My page is no longer entirely white! Now I just need...one thousand two hundred more words. About this thing which is in Middle English and uses the word 'thou' copiously."

Suddenly and with all the force of a charging heffalump, you realize you're totally fucked, which triggers in you a primal reaction because oh god, I'm going to fail! Failure! I will be forced into a lifetime of menial labor and possibly I will have to wear an orange jump suit and live in an all-women maximum security prison when I shoot a man for ordering extra pickles on the side and then pinching my ass! And by the time your eyes have cleared (a daymare of Burger King and bunk mates named Bessie having flashed before them), you're out of breath and wide-eyed and hopped up on adrenaline - now you're never going to get that goddamn paper done because you can't sit still. So you go out for a run around the block and don't realize it's pouring until you're halfway down the driveway and a loud blast of thunder sets a car alarm off next to your head. Squelching, you come back to your computer and hover, anxious, for a few more minutes; when that doesn't magically make the essay write itself, you shuffle through your papers and assignment book.

That's when you notice that there's yet another essay due the next day that you haven't started.

Ah hah. Hah. Fuck.

ETA: 250 words! \o/

Happy Birthday, nu_breed! Congratulations, you are indeed another year awesomer. *smoosh* Have a great day, sweetie!

In other news, the loudspeaker just came on. "ATTENTION ALL LIBRARY STAFF AND FACULTY. RIGHT NOW, WE ARE HOLDING A CLASS IN THE ROOSEVELT AUDITORIUM ON THE FIRST FLOOR: THE DELICATE ART OF PATRON SERVICE! ALL FACULTY AND STAFF WELCOME!"

The delicate art of patron service, guys. He said there was going to be Patron Service Jeopardy. I think the entire computer lab is stifling its laughter right now, in deference to the fact that some of the poor workers are looking hugely embarassed. PATRON SERVICE JEOPARDY. Can't you just see it? I'll take 'Dainty Dewey Decimal' for five hundred, please.

This icon has never been more appropriate.

pssst, sofie! you around today? i'm on gmail messenger until 3:45, and aim if i can force meebo to work.

I'm currently on a computer that faces out towards, oh, THE ENTIRE LIBRARY, and people keep walking behind me and looking at my screen, so. Yeah. Keep it clean, but PLEASE ENTERTAIN ME. I'm so, so, incredibly bored. I didn't think it was possible to be this bored on your first day of classes, but I have an hour to kill before my next class and, miraculously, none of my professors so far have actually required text books, thus leaving me with no reason to go spend money in the school bookstore. Woooeee.

I'm on gmail chat - mackenzie.phifer@gmail.com - if anyone wants to come distract me from my unending boredom. (PLEASE I WILL PAY YOU LATER IN... SOMETHING-THAT-I-CANNOT-TYPE BECAUSE: EYES! EYES EVERYWHERE!)

Anyway, courses haven't been so bad. My philosophy teacher speaks like that guy from Princess Bride; I spent the entire hour barely stopping myself from giggling, "Inconceivable!" The guy teaching Intro to Archeology is from Serbia and has this weird idea that presentations are totally the way to go, which made me nearly cry. Five presentations all together! Arhhg! American Studies professor kind of made up for it, though, because he looks like that dude who shoots lasers out of his eyes in the X-Men movies, except, like, stretched out to 150% in Photoshop - much thinner and taller and HE WEARS GLASSES. He sort of made me want to bake cookies.

ps, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT SO HERE'S HERMIOD WITH A PANCAKE ON HIS HEAD. \o/